Getting hit on at the beach or bar can get old quickly. Let’s face it, it isn’t like a twenty-something gal to stay single for long, but what’s a girl to do when she just can’t seem to run into the right guy? Maybe it’s time to consider online dating.

Season two of "Catfish: The TV Show," shows that the person behind the profile doesn’t always have harmless intentions. So before you make a profile, consider how it can drain self esteem, and then proceed with caution.

You’re sitting at home with nothing to do—so you check your Facebook. Automatically, you browse through the home page hoping to find something juicy or rather scandalous in today’s world. But that could mean anything, including seeing that your friend is in love, again. Surprise, surprise, a relationship that consisted of exactly one week is now classified as forever and always. Now, where are the wedding bells?

It seems that lately, anyone could come down with the Romeo and Juliet effect. Oh you know, the one where they meet—their eyes catching each others from across the room, sparks are flying—or maybe it’s cause the candle just lit up the curtain by the window. But they don’t notice that, all they see is each other. He sees her, and she sees him, and he sees her seeing him. Ah, love.

If you happen to be one of those love struck girls who showcase that love a little bit too much, then read on, don’t hate me, and implement the following tips into your life. And if you’re not an offender, then feel free to agree completely, all the while forcing your friend who currently has the love bug to read this. ASAP. 

Quit the mushy statuses already: I can’t tell you how much it irritates me to do my daily creep sesh of Facebook only to see that my cousin’s friends, who are thirteen, are apparently in “love.” Or so they say. These little younglings have Facebook statuses that go along the lines of, ‘I love you so much baby, you’re my one and only, forever and always.’ Uh, you’re thirteen; couldn’t you be classified as the baby in this situation? It doesn’t make sense that people are hurrying to fall in love, especially while being so young. Instead of racing to get out of high school—some teens are racing to the alter. You know what they say: what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas—talk about a fun after-graduation trip. But if you definitely are an extreme offender of writing mushy Facebook statuses—then please, for the love of God, stop! Instead, text that super sweet, make-other’s-want-to-puke message to your boo boo bear (I would put boyfriend, but by some of the statuses I’ve seen—clearly boo boo bear fits).

So, you’re in head-over-heels-life-seems-like-it’s-all-bubblegum-and-rainbows kind of love? Cool story, bro. Tell me more. Actually wait, please don’t.

Think about if it’s really love. I have a friend who met her fiancé when she was just sixteen. After about a week, she was convinced that they were meant to be. You would have thought that “falling in love” would require actually getting to know the person, but these days some people seem to be skipping that part.

Now, it isn’t fair to say that all quickies of love turn bad, right? But if you’re young and convinced that you’re over the moon in love—then maybe take a step back to get your feelings in check. A lot of girls mistake love for lust, especially while it’s the beginning of a relationship and everything is in that perfect stage. Soon, those lovely flaws will come out, and your feelings might not still be all there. So just make sure that you’re not investing too much into something that could just be another silly, young romance.

Be careful about who you’re making your everything. In your group of friends, you’re bound to have had at least one girlfriend who suddenly goes MIA as soon as a guy enters her life. She starts to ditch you, she spends all her time with the chosen one, and she gets defensive when you try to talk to her about it. If this is you, then you need to make sure that the person who you’re making your everything is really all he seems to be. In truth, what’s going to happen if the relationship doesn’t work out? How will it feel when you make someone everything—only to have them become, well, nothing? That leaves us loyal, single friends to bring over the only men you’ll ever need: Ben and Jerry, chocolate mint flavored, and the new Cosmopolitan to have you feeling confident, which screams: I’m a strong, independent woman, hear me roar!

But, unfortunately, that’s not the case all the time. If you’re friends are easily forgiving, then they’ll stick with you even after Mr. Wonderful waltzes out of your life. But for some, you may have to do major damage control to repair the friendships that you used to have. Just remember, having a boyfriend is all about balance—balance for him, balance for your friends, balance for yourself and your life.

It is true that love happens, but if you’re on Facebook and feel like professing your love to the world—please don’t.  Next time you meet that amazing, funny, charming guy—please, take it slooowly. Don’t scare the guy away by professing your love to him at two o’clock in the morning outside of his window, Romeo/stalker style. Instead, keep it to yourself. You’ll be doing him, yourself, and all the other bitter singles of the world a huge favour.

So, next time you get bitten by the love bug, stay inside and lock the doors. Oh, and keep the computer turned off. The rest of the world doesn’t need to be infected.

By Sarah Kester | Photo: weheartit.com

We love Beckham…uh, soccer, we mean soccer.

Confession #1—love makes girls do crazy, crazy things.

Picture this—you’re on a first date and so far you have managed to follow all the tips Google has graciously searched for you. Plus, you’ve even managed not to snort a laugh, choke on your lemon chicken, or admit that you have already envisioned what your children will look like. Sounds picture perfect, right? That is until the conversation takes a turn for the worst into (cue dramatic sound effect) Dun Dun Dunnn… sports. Instantly, you feel the nervous sweat bead on your forehead, your mind curses Google for not warning you about the oh, so obvious topic. But who knows, perhaps Google thought your date was a tree-hugging hippie, who wanted to talk about inner feelings before skipping dessert to summon a moonlight dance under the sky. It may not sound realistic, but you get the picture.

It’s quite obvious to say that we now live in a world where sports are becoming increasing popular to discuss, especially around guys—giving you three choices: stuff your mouth with food to avoid talking, fake a dramatic faint, or tell a lie. So, what do you do? Well, you lie—ding ding ding! We have a winner, or in this case, a cheater.

Confession #2—Girls are amazing multi-taskers, we can check out the score and the quarterback all at the same time.

All around us, we’re receiving different advice about how to act around guys. Even the top woman’s magazines—Cosmopolitan, Glamour, or Seventeen recommend changing yourself so that some handsome prince will come sweep you off your feet and bring you to Disney World. Too bad this is reality—not the movies. But some of these tips revolve around changing your whole sports persona. For example, if you flip to the 'All About Guys' section in magazines, you will see most of the tips revolve around having a sports night with your guy. Even in high schools today, some girls will make T-shirts for their crush before heading off to the game to cheer. But is it for the love of the game, or just the hype? The real question is: do girls love sports for the game or to score the guy? 

Think carefully, but whether you pretend to like sports to impress a guy or you’re just joining his friends for a night at the bar—when it comes to sports and guys here’s what not to do:

1) Pretending you know what the heck is going on.
2) Cheering just because everyone else is—while really, you’re beyond lost.
3) Bringing up how hot the quarterback is… every five seconds.
4) Telling him about your shopping trip while he’s watching the game and getting mad when he pretends to listen.
5) Chugging down a pint of beer because of all the extra spicy wings you ate.
6) Saying you have a favorite player, when really, you only like him for his sexy looks.
7) Wearing a jersey just because it looks “cute.”
8) Swearing at the referee during every call.
9) Making his team your favorite, no matter how much they suck.
10) Making him skip the big game because your best friend and her boyfriend just broke up, and you need him there for “moral support and guy advice.”
11) Walking in front of the TV during the game.

So next time you’re talking to a guy about sports, don’t stuff your mouth full of food, fake a faint, or even lie. Instead, admit to him and yourself that you’re most definitely a 'not it' sports girl and damn well proud of it.

By Sarah Kester | Photo: tumblr.com

I never truly put much thought into how I stare at couples. It’s just one of those subconscious things that we all do sometimes. I don’t mean to stare, or glare—whatever way you want to take it. But c’mon, if I see a couple eating each other’s face off in public, then I will definitely send a long, urgent look to the poor girl, in hopes to save her before the guy mauls her to death. Really, I thought I was simply being the hero in this situation. That is, until one of my friends caught me in the act when I truly realized that I was turning into the single devil herself and yes, I am definitely bitter. 



It’s safe to say that we’ve all seen a new couple in what I like to call, the “honey moon stage.” We all know the classic look—the eyes are wistfully glowing, the blood rushing to the cheeks to welcome that huge smile and the flirty head tilt towards the lucky one, is anything but obvious. Usually, this calls for another glass of wine—not to celebrate this newfound relationship, but to help us single folk cope with our everlasting single status. But really, is being single as bad as it seems? I think yes, and I think no. Obviously it can be bitter sweet, but if you’re a single girl, like myself, then here are some much needed ways to enjoy the single life, and make it mostly sweet, not bitter.

Treat yourself:

Since a guy is no longer in your life, you’ll have some extra cash and time to pamper yourself. Schedule an emergency spa and makeover day ASAP. By tapping into the feel good treatments that make you feel relaxed, you’ll leave the spa feeling reenergized, beautiful and confident! Also, it’ll help you feel happier, which will help get rid of some of those bitter feelings. And who knows, with your hot new look, you’re bound to get some attention. Take it in, bask in it and enjoy.



Work on other relationships:
There are some girls who ditch their friends as soon as they land a boyfriend. If you’re one of them, then take this time to focus on rebuilding the relationships that you have with your closest friends. Make time for them and do things that you used to, like going out for drinks on a Friday night. Not only are you strengthening ties with them, but you’re also pleasing yourself, too. Everybody needs something stable in their life to rely on sometimes, and friends can definitely be your rock. You just have to make sure that you keep and maintain them there. Use this time to mend old friendships, make new ones, or focus on the one with yourself.

Do the things that you could never do while dating someone:

At some point in life, we each need to get that experimental, rebellious period out of our systems. If we don’t, then we might look back and regret some missed opportunities. So your newfound singleness is the perfect time to fulfill some of those spontaneous adventures and dreams that you’ve wanted to do, but couldn’t because of your guy at the time. Say you wanted to take a trip to Vegas, but your last boyfriend refused it, unless he came with—well, with him out of your life, book your flight. Right now. Or better yet, arrange a road trip. Go bungee jumping. Get that tattoo you’ve been thinking of for years. Whatever it was that you always wanted to do, do it! With no guy in your life, it’s your chance to be free and live life under your own regards.

Whether you find a great guy eventually, or stay being single. You need to know, remember and memorize that single doesn’t mean lonely. For some people, being single is a choice, and for others, it’s simply just life and fate mixed together. Don’t give up hope, because one day, when you’re not looking, Mr. Right may suddenly walk into your life. And when he does, appreciate and remember your single days where you kept a good balance in your life and the most important relationship in your life was the one with yourself. If the new guy comes in, make room for him in your life, but don’t forget about yourself and friends too—after all, they were with you during those bitter, but certainly sweet, single days.

By Sarah Kester | Photo: tumblr.com

Yeah, he can cry for us anytime he wants.

For some girls, when they see a guy cry, it can be one of the most adorable things, ever. Simply, because it proves that guys actually do have soft sides, they’re not just the menacing pricks that we sometimes make them out to be. And it proves that they actually have – gasp, pause for a moment – feelings.  But on the other hand, for some girls, seeing a guy cry is one of the biggest 
turn offs because we automatically assume that girls are the emotional ones – we carry our heart on our sleeves and our mascara down our cheeks. But it’s not like that all the time, despite what people think.


If you ask yourself, guys who cry: good or bad?  Some may say good – it means he’s confident in himself. He doesn’t need to even question his masculinity because to him, it’s strong. If you think about it, a guy who can cry in front of you is extremely brave and it proves that he’s secure and essentially, a keeper.

If he’s good with his emotions, then he’ll be more in tune to yours. But again, it can be seen as creating dents in his armor – most guys have a tough guy rep to them, and people assume that females are the ones who will cry over anything. But really, that’s not true at all! With so many misconceptions in the world, it’s so easy to create a bias when it comes to guys and tears.

From our society, most of us see it as wrong, wrong, wrong – especially when guys are sometimes seen as “wimps” or other horrible insults if they shed tears. But now, it’s not stopping some of them from being more up front with their feelings – this includes crying in front of us, and not crying in front of us – I’m talking about closet criers. And no, they do not sit in a closet and cry, that would be kind of uh, weird, but it means that they cry when their alone, or with a really close friend, and never, ever, tell a soul. They have a rep to maintain, remember?

If the moment ever happens where you catch a guy in your life crying, or he breaks down in front of you, be prepared to hear some lame excuse like, “oh, there’s just something in my eye. I’m fine.” When this happens, don’t push him to open up to you, it may come off as over-bearing. Instead, just be there for him, stay quiet and don’t leave his side (unless he asks you to leave), just try to comfort him in subtle ways. Rub his arm, pat his back, grab his hand, draw circles, do something that will make him feel relaxed. It may help him loosen up and really trust you – enabling him to open up and bring you two closer.



Truthfully, all of it can be pretty surreal and shocking, especially when you witness the guy who always had this tough-don’t mess-with me-macho guy attitude, suddenly break down and lose all control of his emotions. It’s raw to see that side of a person, especially when they’re in their most fragile of states. All of which will either make you comfort him, while silently awing in your head, about a million times over. Or, it could send you running – and fast, to the next hunky guy who looks like he could never drop a tear – well, at least in front of you.

But clearly, it does depend on what they’re crying over, if something horrible happened, such as their favorite Grandpa died, or something remotely close to that, then yes, that’s completely normal. But if you find him crying because there’s no more ketchup left, or because you ditched him last minute – something like that. Then, well, you’ve got a whole other, emotional mess on your hands.

So again, I ask: in the time of tears, with all the soft sobbing going on from your guy, or maybe even a best guy friend, what do you do? Grab the tissue box and appreciate this rare moment, or pat his head, in an awkward gesture while making up some lame excuse to get the hell out of there? The moment may never come again, or it might… you never know. It’s up to you to see if you stick around and find out.

So, ladies, what do you think? Guys who cry in front of you: turn on or complete turn off?

By Sarah Kester | Photo: tumblr.com

He always wants to know where you are, he gets angry if you hang out with a guy (including your childhood BFF!) he goes through your texts and accuses you of flirting with other guys. It seems as if you’re dating a CIA agent who could find out exactly where you are, and who you’re with, with the snap of his fingers. Does this sound familiar? If so, then you’re dating a over the top, protective guy.

They start out nice – with their dazzling personality and charm. It seems like he will always be loyal to you, and the relationship will remain in that perfect, honeymoon stage. But over time, imperfections come to the surface – the trust may begin to slip. If he sees a guy writing on your wall, or you go to a party together and you say hey to an old friend, he starts to doubt you.

You feel as if you’ve given him the reigns of the relationship, the control. And if you let it go on too far, it can get out of hand. So to help you lovely ladies gain some of that much needed control again, I’ve compiled some tips to get homeboy to calm the heck down.

Set Limits:

You need to talk to him and tell him what you like and what you don’t like. If you simply just let him walk all over you, then that’s the way it’s going to be. Right from the start, you need to be yourself and speak your mind. If you don’t like something then tell him! Let him know that it’s not okay for him to go through your texts, it’s not alright for him to get jealous at every little thing, and make you lose guy friends just because you’re dating him. Sure, a little jealously is normal but if you find that you’ve lost all control of the situation, and he’s carrying the upper hand in the relationship – all the time, then you need to sit him down and set some limits. Let him know that how he’s acting isn’t right, and if he doesn’t change, then you’re just going to have to make things change yourself. And granted, he won’t like it very much.

Talk to him about his past, there may be serious trust issues there:
I once dated a guy whose previous girlfriend had cheated on him, so when we began dating, right from the start, it was obvious that he had trouble trusting girls. He would go through my phone, message my close guys on Facebook to stop talking to me and go overboard when I even talked about another guy. I tried talking to him about it, because at the time I didn’t know about his previous girlfriend. After he opened up to me, I understood where he was coming from a bit, but it wasn’t enough to let him off the hook. I explained to him that I’m not that girl, just because she cheated doesn’t mean that I was about to run off and do the exact same. With time, by letting him see that I wasn’t that kind of girl, the trust began to grow and the over protectiveness began to subside.



If it gets way too much, and he just won’t stop, then let him go:
If you’ve tried everything you can – you’ve talked to him, you’ve reassured him and he still won’t let up, then you maybe fighting a lost cause. Some guys are just that way, nothing you can do will ever change them. Over the years, something major may have stopped him from trusting not only girls, but anyone. If that’s the case then all you can really do is move on. It’s not fair for both of you to be in a relationship where trust isn’t there. We’ve all heard that trust is everything, and it’s so true. If he walks all over you and invades on every aspect of your life, then the two of you are not in a healthy relationship. You end up caving in, losing friends because of him, and generally becoming afraid of everything you do, because you feel like you’re constantly doing something wrong. If that keeps happening, you need to get out of the relationship! At that point, you’ve become weak, and girl, you’re better than that!

Ladies, got any good tips for containing an overprotective guy?

By Sarah Kester | Photo: tumblr.com