It might seem like some girls are forever tied down by a relationship -- think Taylor Swift, who falls hard and fast. She’s been in over seven relationships in the last two years, and Taylor’s ex-boyfriends almost seem to overlap one another. Taylor falls under the category of a serial monogamist (SM), or someone who does not leave room to breathe and get over their exes in between relationships. By constantly changing who they date, serial monogamists are not learning how to develop their relationships by creating a deeper connection with their partner. Unfortunately, most girls do not even know they are a serial monogamist, so here are a few signs to look out for!
The most obvious sign of a serial monogamist is that they chain date, meaning one of their relationships starts right where the previous ends. Their relationships don’t tend to be long-lasting, and the intensity progresses quickly -- almost entirely skipping puppy love, heading straight to serious.
From Hookup to Boyfriend
Each random hookup or quick fling quickly transitions to the guy being labeled as the boyfriend. Serial monogamists quickly become emotionally attached to boys when shown attention, often misinterpreting feelings of lust with feelings of love.
The Thought of Being Single is Scary
Do serial monogamists even know what being alone feels like? Many serial monogamists are afraid of what their life would be if they were single; they like the idea of the companionship, love and the constant flow of attention and affection. Psychologist and success coach Dr. Sam Von Reiche said, “fear of commitment and perfectionism play a large part in the serial monogamists thinking.”
Friends Do Not Take the Relationships Seriously
In most cases, girlfriends are always there to to listen to the juicy stories of a new relationship or give advice during the hard times, but the friends of a serial monogamist would rather talk about the weather than their friend’s new man. Since their boyfriends change as fast as their outfits, they think, “Why keep updated or invested in their relationship?”
While many people think girls who have relationship after relationship are lucky to quickly find love, the reality is, they are a serial monogamist. Recognizing the behavior of serial monogamy is the first step in making the change. Serial monogamists need to realize that finding Mr. Right can not be forced and that being single is not bad!
By: Marina Tomao | Images: 1, 2
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